Listen to Your Heart

Love Yourself Enough to Know When Its Time To Walk Away…

I know a woman who wanted to be in a relationship. The pressure of those around her was getting too deep. Friends questioned why she was still single and why she didn’t give dating a chance. Their judgment pierced her heart. She didn’t let them know, but it hurt. She felt perfectly fine discovering who she was spiritually, mentally and professionally. She was making great strides in her life and she took pride in working her way up the success ladder. But all of that didn’t matter to them because she didn’t have a man to validate her.

One day, when she least expected it she met a guy. He saw her in the midst of a sea of women and wanted her. She was flattered. He wasn’t the type of guy she normally went for, but she was open-minded and his persistence was admirable. Turns out, he was exactly who she was looking for. He was educated, ambitious and he understood her. It took a certain type of man to understand the type of woman she was but he did. Within a few months of talking they knew a relationship was the next step and made it official. She was on cloud nine. Could this be her husband? Things were great until things weren’t great.

This relationship became a problem when she realized that he struggled with a problem. She went to his house one evening and his over-zealousness was an indication that he had been drinking. Continue reading “Listen to Your Heart”

Living in Purpose: Human Trafficking, Tiffany Wright and my first Docu.

When I was a junior in high school, I joined an organization called Council for Unity. Each year the organization focused on an issue happening around the world to raise awareness to the whole student body in a mandatory forum. Everyone apart of this organization had a role, but the most important thing we did collectively was research the annual issue.

The year I joined, the issue was Human Trafficking. All my life, I never knew such a heinous operation was occurring in the world. We are taught to believe that slavery was abolished in 1863 but it still occurs and millions of men, women, and children are victims to this crime. Human trafficking is a billion dollar black market industry and despite efforts to contain this problem, it’s growing rapidly.

I was shocked, afraid and empowered all at the same time. I wanted to know everything I could about this issue. I became dedicated to researching and raising awareness about Human Trafficking. All I could think of was those poor children in Thailand forced to have sex with men 3-times their age or naive women who put their trust in someone that tells them they can make their dreams of becoming a model true, only to be tricked into prostitution. Can you imagine being kidnapped, stripped of your passport and identity, beaten, and raped repeatedly, only to feel like there is no way out? To be honest, after learning about human trafficking I was never the same; a part of my innocence was taken away after researching these vile things but it couldn’t be compared to the innocence taken away from the actual victims. Continue reading “Living in Purpose: Human Trafficking, Tiffany Wright and my first Docu.”

The Pressure

Oh the pressure! Maybe its me, maybe it’s them but the pressure exists. The older I get the more I realize I have to try and wean out that pressure in my life. Some people are not meant to be placed in a box and I am one of those people. I feel anxiety when people tell me I can’t fulfill my dreams because it’s not lucrative or won’t make me a million dollars. I also feel that same feeling of not being able to breathe when someone tells me what I should be doing as opposed to what I am currently doing.

I am a creative. I am at my happiest place when I am doing what I love. I am not where I want to be yet, but I believe every single thing I am doing with my life is what I always wanted to do. I have a board in my room and it lists my strengths. Under strengths it says Human Rights/Human Trafficking/Women Issues, Writing/Blogging/Websites, and Fashion Styling. Yes, fashion styling was something I always wanted to do on the side as a hobby but I never ventured into it for some reason. On the other side of the board it has travel and a list of places I would love to visit for the year and then finally there’s a list of my ultimate dreams and goals in life. I use this as a source of inspiration. When the year started I told myself I wanted to be bold and consistent. When I look back on the first half of 2015, I’ve definitely been more bold and I’ve tried to be consistent. I manage my Reserved website and blog on both my travel and lifestyle blog. This summer I will release a documentary that I’ve worked on for the past year dealing with human trafficking/prostitution. I’ve also shared some of my projects on social media which is huge and something I still struggle being comfortable with.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that this is only the beginning and will get better from here. Maya’s video gave me hope. She talks about her “come up,” and how God has blessed her life in so many ways. I am happy she created this video because it serves as a major source of inspiration for my journey as well.

Follow Lifestylebyky.com

Instagram @lifestylebyky

Twitter @bykyblogs

Summer Summer Summer Time!

There is something about summers in New York. I can’t explain the feeling but it’s just liberating. Each year, there has been some kind of life lesson or personal growth that took place in my life during the summer months. I am inspired to become a better version of me for the latter part of the year and give life my best foot forward. One of the things I enjoy doing and have been doing every year since I graduated is create a list of things that I want to do over the summer. It could be something dealing with the arts, maybe a new exhibit, possibly write more, wear my hair natural, whatever it might be I always try to hold myself accountable for my goals.

2011

When I first graduated from Penn State in 2011, I was lost. I didn’t have the slightest clue where I was going to work in the fall, I had no money and no insight into my future, but those things did not take the fun out of my life. I was shockingly content with finding myself. I let go and let God take control and I allowed myself to live a little. Just getting out of a bad pseudo-relationship, I spent the summer rebuilding my self-esteem, writing, and on youtube learning everything there was to know about the big chop and being natural(It would take 2-years before I actually wore my hair natural). I even started an earrings business.

DSC02218_2 Continue reading “Summer Summer Summer Time!”

Making New Friends as an adult

Why is it that once we’re in our 20’s we have this no new friends mentality? I absolutely love meeting new people. I have a lot of friends as it is, but it doesn’t hurt to know more. Sometimes I look at the strange faces on the train and it hits me, I don’t know a thing about these people and I never will but for 20-minutes we share the same train car on the way to work. Who are they? What are their dreams? What makes them different? Unfortunately, I will never know the answer to these questions. Not because I can’t just walk up to them and ask (because I can), but social norms tells me not to.

Growing up making friends came so naturally to me, but the older I got, the more reserved I became. Sometimes I even question if my demeanor is welcoming or aloof? Professionally, making new friends is key. It always helps to find people who want the same things out of life as you because you guys can go to the same events together or enjoy similar things, but I haven’t been able to find that person. Maybe I am living in lala land and making new friends in adulthood is weird, but is it so wrong to want a blogger buddy who loves to brunch? I found this video on Buzzfeed and it warmed my heart.

Follow Lifestylebyky.com

Instagram @lifestylebyky

Twitter @bykyblogs