What happens when you are surrounded by friends who unknowingly gives off negative energy? Or family who never have anything good to say about you? What happens in situations when you want to be the bigger person, but it’s so much easier to stoop down to someone’s level instead of rising above the foolishness?
A friend of mine shared with me that one of her goals in 2017 was to protect her energy. This means staying away from all of the aforementioned. Her goal shook me to my core, I wanted to do the same. As someone who is progressively trying to move towards a more positive life, it’s hard when you’re sometimes surrounded by people who don’t want to do the same work in themselves. Here’s how I plan to protect my energy in 2017:
There’s a season for everything and everyone…Let it Go!
Hard pill to swallow that some people are meant to be in your life for a season even though you thought it would be for a lifetime. I’ve learned a long time ago to let people go when they no longer feed positivity in your life; when their energy is no longer building you up, and you’re not doing the same for them either. You either outgrow some friends or you don’t grow with them fast enough. Let them go. Even if it’s for a season, because holding on to a dead friendship is more emotionally draining than anything. If they’re true friends, they will find their way back.
Fight Negativity with Positivity
This is easier said than done. I have a family member who is absolutely miserable. Every time he sees me, he says something to me that’s meant to tear me down. I know why he does it. Like the old saying goes, misery loves company but I don’t feed his negativity with more negativity as hard as that is. I feed him with positivity. I return his negative comments with positive comments about himself, leaving him for the most part dumbfounded. I learned that strength doesn’t come with an eye-for-an-eye mentality. No, strength is when you are able to ignore and rise above the hate.
If you don’t want to do something don’t do it. If you know the area surrounding the club your friends want to go to is dangerous, don’t go. If you know a certain group of friends only get together to gossip, avoid those outings. If you know a birthday dinner is going to be triple the cost of your actual meal, propose a brunch the following day instead. If you get a funny feeling about something and you feel like you shouldn’t do it, then don’t. It’s so important to learn to say no to things that’s not for you.
Gossip is anything that you say about someone that you can’t say with them present because it’s negative. Avoid it. Firstly, it doesn’t feel good to revel in someone else’s adversity. Besides, what goes around comes around, so be careful how hard you laugh at someone else’s situation.
Last but not least, forgiveness. It’s so important to just let it go and forgive those who have wronged you. Forgive those who have not apologized yet. Forgive those who hurt you. Just forgive and exhale.